We ended 2015 on a wild rollercoaster ride fueled on high, gleeful emotions mixed with a twinge of apprehension. Then roughly one week into 2016 all the happiness and relief came abruptly to a halt. Once again, broken promises, dishonesty, and extreme selfishness, all while crying self pity and playing the blame game, came to light. It is very difficult to allow people back into your life, even just a little, when they have habitually wronged you. It is difficult to let go of the deep hurt they have callously caused over a tremendous amount of time and without care.
We have licked our wounds long enough, from the most recent incident, and now that it is the season of Lent, we are taking stock of our lives and of what/who is important to us. We call it Coming Back to Center. These next 40 days we will be using this time to:
1. Clean out the clutter of our home by removing items we no longer need or use.
2. Clean out emotional clutter that may be holding us back from achieving goals.
3. Reevaluate relationships:
set up safeguards,
exercise our right to say no,
exercise our right to not participate in emotionally damaging relationships
We are going to write, talk, and breathe. Self examination is not an easy task but at the end of our self examination journey, we hope to be more focused, more centered and emotionally stronger.
I will do my best to update our progress as we move along through Lent. I have already begun cleaning out the physical clutter. Yesterday I scoured our bathroom, organized the drawers and pitched quite a collection of half used bottles of lotions and such. It feels very freeing. Today I am moving in on our hall closet filled with an assortment of shoes and jackets most of which are too small now.